5 of the most awkward social media moments by Holly Brockwell
Social media is the best and worst thing in the world. It keeps us entertained, it keeps us in touch with our friends, and it keeps a whole world of drama waiting at our fingertips. Which is great, as long as you’re not directly involved.
Since we appreciate any excuse for a bit of Tyrrells, here are the top 5 social media meltdown moments that cause us to reach for the Poshcorn. Pass the bowl, this is going to get juicy.
1. The accidental Like
Picture the scene. You’re two years deep into your ex’s new partner’s Instagram feed, making all kinds of snap judgments based on body language and t-shirt choices, when you accidentally do the Double Tap of Doom.
Uh oh. Not only have you just Liked a photo from literal years ago, thus proving you were having a serious stalking sesh, but you also don’t follow this person and they know exactly who you are. Can you un-like before they – or your ex, or your ex’s mum – see the notification? Aaaargh, the horror. Best to throw your phone in the river and change your name.
2. The Snap story of betrayal
“Ohh, I would so LOVE to come to your birthday party but I’m stuck at my great aunt’s 80th in Doncaster. There’s going to be a three-tier cake and ballroom dancing and I definitely can’t get away before Great Uncle Joe starts making his speech at 10pm, if he stays awake that long…”
Cast-iron excuse, right? Detailed, believable, and boring enough that you’ve stopped paying attention by the second sentence. You wave your friend on her merry way and accept their non-presence at your earth-shattering party to end all parties.
UNTIL. Laying in bed, recovering from your epic shindig with the headache from hell, you casually cycle through all your friends’ Snap stories from the night before. Nothing from your friend who couldn’t make it – makes sense, who’d snap their great aunt’s 80th? But wait. Who’s that in the background of your arch-frenemy’s dance floor selfie?
THE FRIEND. Who is in fact at a club in town and not at all in Yorkshire partying it up with the olds. Oh, they were smart alright – no Facebook check-in, no tweets, no stories on Insta or Snap – but there’s that undeniable face (two-face, if you will) in other people’s posts. BUST-ED.
Note: this is also why you don’t have your boss on social media if you’re ever planning to pull a sickie.
3. The family comment war
Everyone knows that posting a divisive or political topic on Facebook is asking for trouble, but sometimes you genuinely can’t help yourself. For instance, when you feel so strongly about a topic that it becomes hard to believe anyone with a heart would feel differently, you can easily forget all the strange relatives and former schoolmates lurking in your friend list.
Because it turns out some people DO feel differently, and they feel VERY STRONGLY INDEED. Worse, you’re related to all of them, and while you were idly browsing your friends’ cat photos, a full-on comment war started underneath your status. Within minutes, it’s strayed entirely off the original topic and now encompasses thirty years of family grievances, complete with ALL CAPS diatribes about how your cousin raises their kids and emoji-strewn screeds about the seating arrangements at great-grandma Magdalene’s wedding aeons ago.
You may be tempted to delete the status to take away their battleground, but this will just result in them all calling you (speaking from experience here) and venting their fury at you instead. All you can do at this point is turn off notifications and let them tire themselves out.
On the bright side, you’ll probably learn some family secrets you weren’t aware of.
4. The secret account
Ohh, this is a juicy one. We’ve all been in the situation where we really want to post something on social media but don’t want certain people to see it, right? Well, some people take that to a whole new level with secret side profiles (or ‘alt accounts’) where they post what they really think, without their friends and family knowing about it.
Taken to the extreme, this includes people who make separate Facebook or Instagram accounts to hide the fact that they’re cheating on their spouse, or getting up to shenanigans that said spouse wouldn’t approve of. One such scoundrel was recently uncovered on Reddit’s Relationships board, when his wife innocently clicked on the location tag above an Insta snap, and saw a selfie of him from his secret account. Oops.
5. The screenshot
Oh, the drama a single screenshot can cause – and we’re not talking about accidentally including the volume slider (we’ve all been there. Pressing multiple buttons is hard!).
Whether it’s spotting your friend’s very-much-not-single partner on Tinder (SNAP) or directly reporting what someone said about your friend to that friend (SNAP), screenshots are basically a popcorn bombshell waiting to be dropped. And there’s no way to prevent them – as soon as you send your thoughts (or worse – a photo) to someone else, it’s in their control. The only way to ensure you never fall into the trap is never to say anything you wouldn’t want screenshotted and sent to your entire friend group’s Whatsapp chat. No pressure!
Well, I don’t know about you, but after that whistle-stop drama tour, I’m in need of some sweet snacks. Poshcorn, anyone?